Home again

I had a really good day at work today. Everything seemed to fall into place. Then I drove home, chatted with friends and did some of my assignment for Uni. I am almost there with my Xmas shopping, just one more bit to get. Coffee Man is wonderful and all in the garden is blooming lol.

Well, almost, there's always a catch. SR has been continually in my thoughts. I really do not know why. His new woman will be there all Xmas. All I can think of is the way he kept telling me she would be off the scene soon and not to worry. She will be living with him within days with her kids.

Now, bearing in mind, he lied, he cheated, he hit me, he was happy when our baby died. I am now with a loving, caring sweet guy who my family will love, (they hated SR) what the hell is wrong with me?

I hope this is the last throes of the after effects of the break up, especially after the weekend we just had. He was a perfect gentleman when I wanted him to be, and a perfect Master when he needed to be. To some that will not make sense but it is my way of life.

He was not previously involved in my way of life but he is learning. He is not as vanilla as I thought which makes him all the more perfect when it was the last thing I expected.

I'm smiling as I type this as I recently said to someone that they did not need to justify their thoughts. I think that is the first time I have alluded to my lifestyle in my blog, although I have been open when talking to others on theirs.

Do I need to justify it? No! Bite the bullet girl!

I am who I am. My mother would be horrified, my friends would be surprised, disgusted , inquisitive and missing if they knew. My 2 lives are separate. But I am the same person.